I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize