David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize