Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
