i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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