This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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