Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize