you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
