i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
