So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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