is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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