i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
