I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
