very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
where are you?
Hypothermia
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
