Who wears a wallet chain?!
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
