she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
