In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
