My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
