Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
