let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
