I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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