okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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