i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
