I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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