After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
