North Korea, Best Korea!
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Randomize
