I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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