If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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