My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
