guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Do vagina's smell?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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