Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
