Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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