We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
