A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize