i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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