hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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