The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize
