Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize