I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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