if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
