is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
