just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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