What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
