I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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