May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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