How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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