did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
