You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Pooping to opera.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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