i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
