it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
