why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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