I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize