Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize